The bakery

Juggling two children, a husband, a home, a job, being a school governor as well as studying is never easy. Something always has to give. Sadly this is often 'special time'; that one on one time with the children. And because she's at school, it's more often than not the Frog who misses out.

This weekend I promised her special time, but the only time we could fit it in was if we did an early morning walk together. (Her early: 5.30; mine: ideally a little later). So up early (hers), we rugged up and set off.

Our special time was magically dusted with the lightest sprinkling of snow and punctuated by squeals of delight. It was silent and cold - the sky was black and the street lamps orange. London still asleep.

We walked to the Organic Bakery on Landor Road and Frog ordered - pain au chocolate, croissants, white bread (for bacon sandwiches) straight from the oven and still warm when we got home. Delish!

We chatted, caught up on the week, held hands and just were together. It was only 20 minutes, half an hour at most, but special, special time indeed.

superman!

Over the Christmas break we got to watch some rubbish tv. (I know this is completely outside the boundaries of 'awe and wonder', but we're still human). Anyway there we were watching superman 3 and Rowdy was totally captivated. He didn't really get the plot, but he instinctively understood being a superhero - they fly, they have superpowers, they generally take care of things! And Rowdy like all other children wanted to be one.

So - a red jumper, a cut out blue S, a cape made from a scrap of red fabric, a load of safety pins and a huge amount of 3 year old imagination later - SuperRowdy flew into my world. (Who needs Woolies after all?) And it's been truly wonderful having him there.

Seemingly against my quest for awe and wonder this little bit of TV actually inspired many, many hours of imaginative, happy and great fun play. Not just the making of the costume and the role play of being a superhero, we've also spent a lot of time thinking up some cool new superpowers.

Christmas Tree

Decorating the tree is always much anticipated in the Benson household. Opening up the Christmas Box and unravelling the lights, unwrapping the baubles and uncovering all the forgotten books and other Christmassy bits and bobs is part of the magic of Christmas.

In my imaginary world of perfect parenting Frog and Rowdy dance around delicately and joyfully, carefully and precisely adorning the tree with each decoration, creating a symmetrical, sparkling vision of festivity.

The reality, of course, is different. I spend most of the time sweeping up broken glass baubles, shouting at the kids to put their slippers on and trying to pry the chocolate decorations out of their hot, sticky hands before they both end up in a completely demented sugar rush. Both children end up crying. The tree itself ends up totally lop-sided with the decorations hung on only two of its many branches and our angel looks as though she's hung herself.

But that moment when we've finished and we're all snuggled up on the sofa with Rowdy silenced into a hypnotic trance by the twinkly lights that's awesome!

An angel in our midst

No-one could be more excited than a six year old picked to play the Angel Gabriel in the school play. Not only a speaking part, but the part with the best costume!

Frog came home from school on Thursday last week the bearer of the news that she was the chosen one this year. To say she was thrilled would be a massive understatement (such awe, such wonder). Determined to be the best Angel Gabriel ever (no competiveness there then Frog?!) she announced that I needed to make her a new costume ... "the grim old thing at school mings, I just wouldn't be like a proper angel!"

Indeed.

So we did make a new a costume and as always when we make things it was huge fun and a great way to while away a winter weekend. And, of course there is the miracle of turning some scraps of fabric into a dress fit for an angel, the best angel ever of course.

Christmas Pudding

Christmas Pudding - evocative, sensory and luxurious; delicious, abundant and stirred with a wish. The subject of my favourite chapter in a book ever*, the beginning of Christmas, just a dessert but so much more.

This weekend we made our Christmas Puddings, a little late this year but hopefully not disasterously so. They take days of work but time is part of their luxury. From the soaking to the stirring to the steaming it takes its own time, there's no rushing a pudding.

Christmas is clearly a time for awe and wonder - and cooking is part of that for us. It's magical how some flour, sugar and butter can turn into so many different, delicious things. Throw in some spices and a handful of fruit and Christmas begins.

I'm going to try some new things this year - marshmallows from the Jamie Oliver mag, vanilla fudge from Life is Sweet (thanks Rose!) and gingerbread with 'stained glass' centres for our tree, my guess is they won't last 'til Christmas Day.

The kids love cooking but the wonder of making the pudding is extra special; as they stir and make their wish it's the first time in the year they think about Santa!!


*Oscar and Lucinda by Peter Carey

cup cakes

Nothing much to do with awe and wonder, but I'm really rather proud of these cupcakes I made for the Children in Need cake sale at school tomorrow.

I hope the children love them!

Diggers

It's always a treat in November when you have an unexpectedly sunny day. Today was one of those days: Sydney sky, sunny, not too cold. The perfect day to grab our micro scooters and race to Brockwell Park to feed the ducks. I love my micro scooter, I love how free it makes me feel and how quick it is to get places - even more I love the excuse my children give me to ride it!

We got waylaid on the way to the park by diggers. Any of you with boys will understand, you can't ever scoot past a digger.

They inspire awe (look at the size of that scoop!); they encourage wonder (I wonder what that bit's for?); there are questions that I can't answer (Who's driving? What's that man doing? What's that bit called?) and some I can (Why are they digging up the road? why are they wearing helmets?). We watched and chatted and watched some more.

It's lovely to scoot and it's nice to feed the ducks, but it's even lovelier to be side tracked on a sunny day by diggers. Such a luxury to forget the time and concentrate on what Rowdy is really interested in, his curiosity - awesome, wonderful.

London

One of the great things about living in London is that there is always something brilliant to do... even if it's doing not very much at all.

Often, on a rainy day - as we did this Tuesday - we'll hop on the bus, clamber up to the top deck, beg for the seats right at the front and see what sights we see. And we always see something awe inspiring. London is just like that, especially when you get to cross the bridges.

The Thames is a magnificent river, it's never the same no matter how many times you see it. It's steeped in history, saturated with myth and mystery and of course full of boats - sometimes really fast ones, which especially please Rowdy.

This particular Tuesday, cloaked in cloud of grey we marvelled at London's builders: the planners, architects, artists and engineers that created our beautiful city - from the elegance of the big wheel to the industrial beauty of the chinmeys at Battersea Power Station; from the curiosity of the statues of social science that grace Vauxhall bridge to Big Ben and its enormous bong, which we heard strike 10!

When you live here its easy to forget how beautiful London is, and what wonder mankind can create. The 80p bus ride on the No. 3, and the eyes and excitement of my children help me do just that.

Time Out

Being a working mum means never having quite enough time just to hang out with my kids. Every moment somehow needs to be filled, accounted for, drenched in quality.

Last week(half term), in a quest for simple hanging out time, I escaped. Packing the kids into the car straight after school we braved the M4, M5 and A30. A stop for sandwiches, hideous traffic in Bristol and eight hours of Radio 4 later we arrived in Porthcurno, Cornwall. It was silent and foggy, my phone wouldn't have signal for a week. Perfect!

Jo stayed til Monday, some friends visited for a couple days, the rest of the time was just the Frog, Rowdy and me.

There were so many magical moments and we had so much fun it would be impossible to write it all down. It was also so lazy and laid back that it would probably be very boring to read.

So, what was truly awesome: reconnecting with my children and thoroughly enjoying their company; feeling no pressure to do much other than just be together: to find shells on the beach, to laugh at things, to sing songs, to practise the three times table, to read stories all afternoon, to put on a wetsuit and swim in the sea for one last time before winter; all in all just hanging out - where the what is not important but the who is.

And one last awesome thing: the huge, huge smile on Rowdy's face when he appeared out of the water slide at Penzance Swimming Baths - one I won't forget!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porthcurno

Tickly toes

Last Friday, a gorgeous autumn (or hortum as a friend's little boy calls it) day, I took Rowdy to Dulwich Park to meet a friend and her little girl who is about nine months old.

Rowdy of course found the biggest, deepest puddle to ride his bike through, he shouted his way through lunch and climbed the Barbara Hepworth sculptures. He chased the horses, investigated the falling leaves and hid from us! His normal, loud, boisterous, labrador puppy-like self.

So, it was much to my surprise when he found a fluffy feather that he used it to tickle little Gwen's toes. It was so tender and so gentle and so tickly; she giggling, him too, truly delighted by making her laugh.

I love the interaction between children (most of the time), the genuine pleasure in making each other laugh, in having fun, in tickling.